How can you tell when a company is just not that into you?

I was in the Dallas airport the other day and ran into a guy that I dated last year.  Well, to say we dated is probably an extreme.  We went on two dates.  I thought they were pretty good.  The first was at least good enough to get him to ask me out again.  But after the second one, he didn’t call back. Maybe he just got really busy at work?  Maybe he was in a terrible accident and isn’t out of the coma yet? Or maybe he just wasn’t that into me.

This reminds me a lot of the job search.  How many times have you had a great meeting with an HR or hiring manager – only to never hear back from them again?  Maybe they lost your number?  Maybe they got a huge project dumped on them by the CEO – and are pulling all nighters to get it done?  Or maybe, just maybe, they’re just not that into you.

Finding the right fit at a company is a lot like a relationship.  And when it’s right, and I mean really right, it usually happens pretty quickly.

What are the signs they’re just not that into you?

They extend the hiring process longer than expected.  This typically happens when they haven’t quite found the right fit.  And they don’t want to settle.  And neither do you.  Settling is almost always a short-term situation that gets fixed pretty quickly.   Is this the job you really wanted?  Is this the company you really wanted?  Maybe there were a few things about the job, the company (or even the people) that weren’t perfect, but you were willing to tolerate it.

I remember interviewing with a company where the VP of Sales told me he had a pretty innovative sales recognition strategy.  He’d get on the intercom system and say “Great job, Dave!”  That was it.  That was his big strategy for motivating the sales force to perform at higher than ever levels.  What’s next, a limbo contest?  Yep, right after the hot-dog eating contest (always a big morale booster!).  Then to show the employees they really cared, the entire executive team was going to serve lunch to all employees in the cafeteria.  I could’ve worked at that company.  I could’ve worn the chef’s hat while dishing out the pork ‘n beans.  Most probably, I would’ve been settling.  Most definitely, I would’ve gone home every night wondering why I chose to work with a bunch of schmucks.

Forget about settling.  Go figure out where you really want to work, and target those companies.  Who cares if they don’t have a posting?  Most never will – and they still manage to make hiring decisions.  Amazing, isn’t it?!

Your contact within the company has stopped returning your calls.  No matter how many times you call.  And fortunately they don’t realize it’s you because you don’t leave a message.  Hey stalker, catch a clue.  Many, many, many companies have caller ID.  They know it’s you.  They’re not picking up on purpose.  Put the phone down, get out of the house, and go meet some other companies that could use a speed dialer like you!

You’re one of the final two candidates and the executive team has to regroup to make a decision.  But they’re busy – and schedules aren’t working out so it’s taking a while.  Chances are, they offered the other candidate the position and are waiting to see if that person takes it.  Congratulations! You were one of the top candidates (think about how many people didn’t even make it as far in the process as you!).  Take your 2nd place trophy, toss it in the garage with your grade school memories, and move on.  Go find the company where you will be number one!  It’s out there and it’s waiting for you.  So hurry up.

When a company is not that into you, it’s okay.  Here’s the thing.  Not hearing back is actually a good thing.  It means you’re not the right fit.  It frees you up to go find a company where you will be the right fit.  One-way relationships aren’t fun for anyone.  So quit prolonging the pain.  Get out there.  Meet more people.  Build more relationships.  And “save the pretty” for someone who deserves it!

And what happened with that guy?  It doesn’t really matter.  Turns out, I just wasn’t that into him after all.